Shadowed
by Sparkling Dragon Tears
Summary: Ron's secret is discovered. Is he alone as he thinks? W: cutting, depression, selfharm, light swearing. NO INCEST OR ROMANCE. Just angst. Happy ending.
1. The act

D/C: JKR OWNS HP PPL. I MAKE NO MONEY OFF THIS I JUST HOPE PEOPLE WILL LIKE IT!  
This is N-O-T NOT a songfic. Just idea'd on a song by Ashlee Simpson.

----WARNING----  
DEPRESSING STORY. It does have a happy ending, but the story is SAD. Cutting, Eating disorders, depression, overall self-harm.  
DONT LIKE DONT READ.  
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This story is all about the Weasleys. Specifically four of them. In order of amount, least to most, Bill, Fred, and George and Ron are close, but it's a mostly Ron story.

FYI i dropped Percy. He isn't even like...alive in the story. He's just not mentioned with the rest. O.o

Uh...Enjoy! This is complete so you just gotta wait till i add it all! (shouldnt be too long.)  
However, its like one thirty AM and i dont really feel like adding more tonight. so one chappie might have to suffice till morning.

- - - -  
Living in the shadow  
Of someone else's dream,  
Trying to find a hand to hold,  
But every touch felt cold to me...  
- - - -

Shadowed

Ron Weasley had drastically changed in the past year. He hid it well, but underneath his skin, he was torn up. He was angry, sad, hurt, and feeling alone. Only, no one every noticed because he hid it so well. He joked and laughed. He talked with his friends and acted the same as ever. Key word-acted.

Now he had been home from Hogwarts for two weeks. Tonight at dinner his mother served her usual huge portioned meals. And like he had for the past few weeks, Ron took the smallest amount of everything and pushed it around on his plate barely eating. The thought alone repulsed him. Whenever he thought no one was looking, he would wave his wand under the table and silently disappear his food. It always went unnoticed. He always got away with it. So he thought. As he concentrated on his plate, he was unaware of the bright blue eyes glued to him, filled with pain.

Shortly, Ron excused himself from the table and run up to his bedroom. Halfway up the stairs, a dizzy spell came over him. He could barely breathe and he couldn't see well. His head pounded and he tried to shake it off. After a moment of bracing himself against the hand railing, he focused on the floor and walked to his room.

Once reaching it, he closed the door and locked it. He went to his dresser and opened the bottom drawer. Under all his cloths was a hand cloth folded in a small package. He gently took it out and tumbled it around in his hands for a moment before unfolding it. A shining knife gleamed up at him. He looked into the reflection of his eye and watched as the pupil grew larger.


	2. Thoughts and crimson tears

Finally he took the knife tightly in his hand and went to his door. He listened. Hearing nothing, he rushed to the bathroom. Closing the door tightly and putting a locking charm on it, he looked at himself in the mirror.

_Look at yourself. Look how pathetic you are. Everyone expects you to be like Harry, strong, heroic. They wish you were creative like Fred and George. You can't even create an essay for Snape. Not that he likes you anyway. But why should he if you don't even deserve to be liked by YOURSELF? Well,you may not be smart, strong, or liked, but you are pathetic. You're lying to your whole family, even your mother! You won't even eat the food she made for you! All because she loves you._

"I don't deserve it." Ron whispered to himself. The tiny voice in his head shut up as soon as he made the cut. Again and again he let the blood come out his aready cat-scratched arms. Zig-zag lines, deep lines, it didn't matter anymore. As long as he could do something. He had to punish himself for being so worthless. He had to make all the pain go away.

"Not that they notice." he mumbled with tears brimming his eyes. He slid down the door and sat on the floor holding his head in his hands. At last, the blood caked over the gashes and he stood up. His head spun out of control. He didn't know if it was from blood loss or not eating. Maybe both. Either way, he jumped in the shower and turned it on as cold as it could go. Soon he became numb by the icy water, despite the flaming heat outside.


	3. Did you notice?

Yay, a longer chapter! ok, this has some humor. i cant keep out little laugh moments. so you'll notice them here and there.

enjoy this knowing i added at almost two AM.

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Eventually, he did get out of the shower. He wrapped a towel firmly around him and tousled his hair dry with another. Being sure to hide his knife in a towel, he made his way from the bathroom and to his bedroom once more. Before even getting cloths out, he hid his secret weapon in his drawer once more. A knock on the door made him jump. He quickly threw on a long sleeve black shirt and rummaged for pants.

"Ron, Mum said to tell you Mione and Harry are coming later tonight." Ginny delivered her message and quickly skipped down the hallway. Ron audibly sighed and pulled on the rest of his cloths. He ran his fingers through his hair and looked in the mirror. All he saw was his scrawny self. He growled and went downstairs to sit in the living room until his friends came. He really didn't want to see them, much less talk to them...or anybody for that manner... but if he didn't, he knew everyone would be suspicious.

So he flopped on the couch and sighed. He stared into the fireplace and before he knew it, he was being gently shaken awake.

"Ron, Ron..."

"No, No Herms. You gotta do this, HEY WAKE UP! THERES A SPIDER ON YOUR FACE!" That was until Fred decided to wake him up.

"AHHHHH! GET IT OFF!" He shouted falling to the ground. He felt Hermione's gentle hand on his shoulder.

"It's ok Ron. There's nothing there." He nodded and jumped up. Brushing himself off and yawning widely, he looked around. It was very dark. In fact, no lights were on except in the living room.

"Wha' time issit?" he mumbled still waking up. Harry grinned.

"Like four AM dude. We just had to say hi when we got here." Ron stared at Harry unamused.

"You came at four in the morning." he stated flatly. Hermione nodded shyly and Harry grinned again.

"Yeah, turns out the Dursleys had a ton of alarms and shit to keep me locked up. Herms got me free though...after a while... a LONG while..." Harry grinned as she smacked his head.

"Language Harry James Potter." She couldn't help but smile though. "You should get to sleep in your bed Ron, otherwise you'll get a cramp in your neck."

"Shut it Mione! Stop nagging me!" he snapped at her. She leaned back in astonishment. The twins stared at him in shock and Harry almost stepped in to intervene.

"Ron?" she asked hurt. Ron saw her eyes and immediately regretted getting out of control. He pulled her into a hug.

"I'm sorry. I'm really tired. You know how I get." he said grinning and pulling back. "Forgive me?" he asked with puppy dog eyes. She instantly brightened. She laughed and nodded.

"We ALL should get some sleep." Harry said. Ron and Hermione nodded. Fred and George snuck behind Ron and stood there until he noticed. Which he didn't. Instead he mumbled goodnight' to everybody and headed off to the stairs. The twins frowned and fell onto the couch simultaneously. Harry and Hermione laughed.

"G'night!" they both called before bounding up the stairs after a trudging Ron. As soon as they were out of sight, George spoke.

"Did you notice how snippy Ron was?" Fred nodded.

"You know him. He's probably just exhausted." he shrugged to George and hopped off the couch.

"Night G." George nodded and watched as Fred skipped every other step on his way up the stairs. He turned to the fireplace and sighed. Sure there was no fire, but it was still the focus of deep thought.

-  
ok so its a little boring here, but it gets better.  
hope you liked!  
J X


	4. Start of a long day

Woo!  
Thanks to Midnight808 for reviewing. Glad you like it! There lots to come. Its already complete so im just adding it. :)

Sha-la! I have a surprise party for my friend to go to in a couple of hours. Her 16! Yay! Happy B-Day Christa!

Ok. enjoy!  
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Next thing George knew, Ginny slid down the banister and thumped on the floor. She joined him with a flop on the couch. He bounced a little and turned to her. He smiled at her energy in the mornings.

"Morning! What time did you get up? You never get up early." she commented thoughtfully. George had just now realized that he never went to bed. He shrugged and she raised an eyebrow. "Any particular reason you got up before the sun?" she asked. He shrugged again and thought up a lie.

"I dunno. Couldn't sleep I guess." Ginny nodded and kissed his forehead. She then skipped into the kitchen. George heard the clinking of dishes and soon the aroma of food crept in and his stomach growled. Just then Fred slid down like Ginny had moments before.

"George! Where were you last night? It's not like you to stay up all night." George knew he was only concerned, but he was still frustrated at his twin.

"I'm fine Fred." he said exasperated. Fred only came closer and examined his twin's eyes.

"George, you look freakin' stoned! Aren't you even tired?" he asked gently. George stood up and shook his head.

"I'm ok." seeing the look of doubt on Fred's concerned face, he added, "I promise Fred." This seemed to satisfy him and he smiled.

"Breakfast then!" he announced happily. George plastered on a grin and bounded from the room with Fred at his heels.

They sat at the table as Ginny placed plates of pancakes in front of them.

"Thanks!" they both chimed before shoveling food into their mouths. Ginny just rolled her eyes and laughed. They heard people coming down the stairs and looked to the door. Harry, Hermione, Molly and Arthur walked in. The Weasley's dad kissed them all and left for work. Everyone else sat at the table and thanked Ginny for the delicious breakfast.

"Ron didn't want to be woken up so I just let him sleep." Harry stated conversationally. Heads nodded in reply and they moved on to conversation about what they had planned for the day. Ginny was going to a friend's house, Molly was going to take Harry, Hermione and Ron to Diagon Alley, and Fred and George were going to stay behind and invent as usual.

However, the day did not turn out as planned. Ron finally came downstairs to see what his mother and friends wanted and his mother stopped him mid step.

-  
DUNDUNDUN I sense trouble! Hope you liked!


	5. Overheated and undernurished

Haha. I like shorter chapters kuz then theres more of them. lol. speaking of, heres another!

En-joy.  
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"Ronald! You look positively ill! Take that shirt off! You're roasting in that thing!" She tried to pull it off him, but he squirmed away.

"No!" he shouted. She looked taken aback for a moment, then smiled. She got a cloth and ran it under cool water. She pressed it against his sweating forehead and flushed cheeks.

"Ron, Go to bed. Please rest. You must rest until you are better. he nodded sullenly and turned to go. You'll be ok until we get back? Fred and George are here if you need anything." Ron nodded and was about to leave the kitchen when the door flew open into him. He fell down to the floor and held his head as the twins rushed in the door. A jagged cut had appeared on his forehead and Fred helped him up.

"So sorry Ron!" He made to get his wand, but Mrs. Weasley had already healed it.

"What was it you needed that couldn't wait for you to be careful?" she barked at them. George looked to his feet as Fred spoke.

"Well, we kinda need some more stuff so we wanted to go to Diagon Alley with you." she smiled, but soon it faded as she looked to Ron bracing himself against the wall. She hurried over to him and placed a fresh cloth on his forehead.

"Ron is sick. I can't leave him alone!" she fretted over him for a moment before he pushed out of her body heat. She looked sadly down at him.

"I'll stay with him, I'm tired anyway. Fred can go and get the stuff we need." George offered. Molly looked unsure. "He'll be fine Mum." he kissed her cheek and pushed her to the fireplace.

"Well, ok. But we'll be back soon!" she said reluctantly. She grabbed floo powder and shouted, "Diagon Alley!" Harry, Hermione and Fred followed the suit. When they all left, George ran back to the kitchen where he found Ron limp on the floor against the wall. Sweat drenched his body and his face was flushed red.

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Heehee. cliffieeeeeeeeeeeees. love em when I write em! lol. Gimmie a few minutes and ill add another chapter.  
Hope you liked!  
Wanna press the pretty little review button? Ill give you a cookie!


	6. Why Ron?

Ok, I made this one longer. This is where it gets a little sadder, but trust me, it gets depressing. I seriously screwed with the Weasleys. heehee

Enjoy!  
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"Oh, no! Ron!" He scooped his younger sibling up in his arms and thundered up the stairs. Ron's room was closest so he kicked the door open and laid his brother in his bed. He took off Ron's long sleeve, black shirt that was sure to be sweltering. He took off Ron's socks and pants leaving him in red boxers. His red hair stuck to his forehead. Barely paying attention, George picked up his unconscious brother and carried him to the bathroom. He filled the bathtub with cool water and set Ron in it boxers and all.

He finally got a chance to relax as he splashed the water over Ron's face. He looked over his brother and his jaw dropped. He knew something was wrong but he had no idea the extremities of it. Ron was pale and severely thin. And worst of all, cuts and scars littered his entire body. All down his arms were scars of a white colour to purple, newer ones and even fresh, raw lines. The cuts carved into his skin crisscrossed, zigzagged and covered one another. Some ran parallel while others seemed more haphazard. Both arms from elbow down looked like scratching posts. He looked at Ron's thin stomach and wasn't surprised to find cuts there too. None on his chest, but he assumed they were on his legs as well. His tear filled eyes traveled to Ron's face. His eyes fluttered open. In a fevered daze, his eyes went wide and he sat up frantically.

"George! No! You aren't supposed to be here!" he shouted. George looked a little taken aback, but mostly worried for his sick brother.

"Ron," he tried to calm him. "You got way overheated and passed out. You gotta relax and get some rest." he went to get towels for his brother. But the second he turned around, He heard Ron sloshing around in the tub. He turned and saw Ron with his knees drawn to his chest and his arms wrapped around his legs. He buried his face in his bare knees and mumbled something. George grabbed the towels and jumped over to the tub.

"What?" he asked gently while placing a hand on Ron's shoulder. Ron shrugged him off. He quietly mumbled, "You saw, didn't you?" George knew exactly what he was talking about, but thought he might chance playing it incase Ron was delusional.

"What do you mean Ron?" Ron looked up at his brother. His sparkling blue eyes were filled with tears. He was shivering but replied steadily, "You know damn well what." He turned to bury his head again, but George wrapped a warm towel around him with strong arms. He lifted his sopping brother out of the tub and undid the drain. Ron did not object or struggle against his brother's warm hold as he was carried to Fred and George's bedroom.

George set him on his bed and dug in his drawers for some cloths. He threw them to his brother who put them on gratefully. Ron wasn't shivering anymore, but he went to wrap George's blanket around his battered body. George gently tugged the blanket from him.

"It's too hot. You'll fry again." Ron nodded and went back to hugging his knees. He sat looking off in the distance until George spoke. He was sitting right next to him on the bed.

"Ron...why?" he asked carefully and quietly. Ron's eyes brimmed with tears once more. He looked back into his knees and shrugged. "You wouldn't understand." he mumbled.

-  
Poor Ronnie. George found his secrets. He doesnt eat and he cuts. Why? Well, keep reading and youll find out!


	7. Think about it Ron

Haha. Yet another short lil chappie. Ill see if I can add a few tonight. Thanks for the reads guys! Almost 200 after only one night! Yet...only one review... -puppy eyes- Review please?

explanations come about soon! For now, Ron's eyes are being opened.

enjoyeth!  
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"Ron, I understand you need help! You're not eating and you're cutting! You can trust me! Why did you do this to yourself?" Ron only let his eyes water and looked into his knees.

"No. You wouldn't understand." He said quietly. George looked at his brother with pure pain on his face.

"Ron..." he breathed exasperatedly. "Everyone has their issues in a family this big! Why couldn't you come to us!" Ron lay his forehead on his knees hiding his eyes.

"No one has problems as big as mine. You just wouldn't get it! No one would!" Ron shouted to his knees. Again laying his hand on his shoulder, George shook his head.

"No Ron. You're wrong." Ron peeked from behind his knees. "Think about it Ron," George said gently. "Bill is the oldest. He constantly has the pressure from Mum and Dad to be the big brother. He has to be the best. At everything he does, Mum and Dad expect the best. If any of his siblings were better than him at something, he would feel like a failure because he IS the oldest and HAS to be best. He gets in trouble if any of us do something wrong, because he's supposed to be the role model. He has the pressure to be on top because with everyone looking up to him, he can't fail. Ron looked down again. Charlie is second. All he has to look up to is perfect. He has to follow in the biggest footprints he's ever seen. His older brother is perfect. He wants to be exactly like him. He knows he has to work his hardest, or he'll fall behind. Mum and Dad want him to be as perfect as Bill was. He always feels compared to him. He always feels inferior, never able to fill the ever increasing footsteps."

By now Ron had laid his head back against the wall and looked to the opposite wall as George spoke. George fidgeted with his hands in his lap as Ron held his half curled position. George continued on.

"Well, there's Ginny too. You have to understand. She's always so happy and peppy, but that's kuz she doesn't dwell on anger and sadness. She's the youngest, so she has to not only fill everyone before her's shoes, but think. She gets treated like gold! China for that matter because she's a girl. We don't let anything get near her. I hate to admit it, but we do overprotect her. We let our emotions get in her way. She never gets to do the things we got to do when we were her age. She gets looked down on constantly. The only difference is that she ignores these things...unless something sparks her anger. Then she gets fiery." Ron smiled a little at that. He was now looking at George. "And there's you." he said pointedly. Instead of turning away like he expected, George was surprised to see Ron looking at him with interest, as if to see if George really understood.

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Does George really get Ron? Or is he playing it? Keep reading! And maybe review? Please?


	8. Understanding Ron

Ok, this ones really short, but the oncoming ones are longer. i think. o well lol just read it and be happy. lol

OK, remember, I kicked Percy out of the story. He'd screw up the curve. LOL

En-jo-hoy.  
...and happy new day.  
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"Well, I'm not gonna deny it, you do have it hard, but there are good things too! You got great friends who would do ANYTHING to save your skin." he said with a grin. "And a HUGE family that loves you no matter what." He ruffled Ron's hair and was surprised to see Ron crack a grin.

"But I do see your view too." he said carefully. Ron's grin dropped, but his interested look remained. "You feel left out. There's always been Bill and Charlie, Me and Fred, and Princess Ginny. You feel like a middleman. You have to look after Ginny, and get in trouble if she does something wrong. You're her closest so she's supposed to look up to you. You're also the youngest boy, so you feel left out and small. You don't think you can fill Bill and Charlie's shoes in smarts and Mine and Fred's in creativity. You aren't the baby anymore and don't feel like you have the attention." He paused to look at Ron. His eyes were glued to his older sibling. His ears tuned to every word. His face held an unreadable expression. George smiled slightly and continued.

"Your friends..." Ron nodded shortly. "You know Hermione is the smartest person in practically the whole school. She could take out almost anyone in academics. And Harry... He is pure bravery. You know he doesn't even try to be the hero he is, yet he has the fame everyone wants. He is known everywhere you go and you feel ordinary. You hate that he is thought of as better than you. He is skilled and has great strengths inside none else have. You know you can't live up to the smarts or the fame. You feel out shined." George ended at last. Ron looked a little lost, but his eyes shone with tears and hope. He never knew George was so understanding. He didn't think George was capable of that thinking. He really didn't think George would pay that much attention to details. He played with his hands for a moment before turning back to George.

"You left out you and Fred." he pointed out. George fidgeted on the spot. He averted his eyes. "Y-yeah. I did that on purpose..." he trailed off and Ron's eyebrows shot up. He glanced at his little brother and stood up. He paced around before rounding on Ron.

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Woa! What does George have up his sleeve? Maybe Ill wait till I get some reviews to add. -evil grin- MUAHAHAHAAAAAAAA


	9. The silver gloves come off

Hey! Thanks to my fabulous reviewers!  
Midnight808-Thanks! This chapter and the next tell George's problem. Keep reading and reviewing ;)  
Lassan Malfoy-you nailed it! Head on! Read and see how much I screwed with the Weasleys ;)

Remember, depressing! Wanna pop a review? Please? -bats eyes-

Well, hope you like this story!  
.,.,.,.,.,

"Tell me you understand. You get it that you're not alone and you'll come to me next time instead of cutting?" Ron scowled. He turned away from George and curled into a tighter ball.

"I knew it. You only wanted me to stop cutting. You think you're perfect. You want the glory of saving baby brother. You don't really care. I thought you understood." George ran his hands through his hair. His face wore a pained expression.

"No Ron! Just please tell me you understand!" Ron's eyes welled up with tears once again and he buried his face in his knees. "Ron!" George cried out. He desperately needed Ron to believe him. He sighed sadly.

"Fine!" he said stiffly. He loosened a little when Ron peaked over his legs. He gently spoke. "Ron...I do understand. Better than anybody-" Ron cut him off though with a snarl.

"You. Do. Not!"

Instead of shouting in frustration, George looked Ron dead in the eye and pulled out his wand. "Look." was all he said. In one syllable, he hooked Ron's eyes away from his legs. He pulled his full attention and gave away pain to Ron. In the one little word, pain, hate, sadness, and something else sang through. He held the tip of his wand on his left forearm by the elbow. He sucked in a deep breath and looked once more to Ron before looking back.

As George dragged the wand down his arm, a shining silver trail resembling molten steel left wherever the wand touched. It began to spread as he moved to his other arm. Ron's eyes went wide and he uncurled from his ball position as the silver formed a long-glove look on each arm before disappearing. Ron's jaw went slack and his eyes filled with fear. He was transfixed on George's arm. It was cat-scratched like his. Like his, only worse. Deeper and longer scars covered his arms. Not all his forearms either. His palms and hands were carved. His arms had words and designs in them, overlapping the normal lines. Purple, white, red, hollowed, raised, thick, thin, every scar imaginable existed. Even burn marks and fingernail curves showed.

"G-G-George..." Ron could barely make out a whisper. He met George's determined eyes.

"All over Ron. My arms and legs, my chest and stomach, even on my neck Ron! Now do you see?" Ron nodded and looked away. His eyes landed on George's arm. Big mistake. A tear tried to force it's way from his eye as he saw just below George's left elbow. A deep, jagged gash worse than any of the others sat shining against the others. George gently tipped his chin up to make him look into his eyes. He spoke softly. "I have to help you. No one was there for me when I needed them until it was almost too late."

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Poor George! Imagine the shock for poor Ronnie.

Now, I dont wanna be one of those pushy authors, you know, "So many reviews or I wont add!" But, a few more wouldn't hurt! Puweeze? -saddened eyes-

Kay. ill add in a little while. I think imma add to a different story. Once thats finished, ill post it too. Review! LOL


	10. Or so I thought

Yay! Glad you guys like!  
Lassan Malfoy-Thanks for the review! Glad you like! Like I said, I seriously screwed with the Weasleys, so you'll see whats up. Fred and George will be explained. :)  
Midnight808-Thanks for the review! Yeah, Ron is scared. He's bloody terrified. Good call! Hope you like this part too!

Kay all. Member, I screwed with the Weasleys. Don't hate me?

Ennnnnnnnnnnnnjoy!  
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"Y-you...Did you... You didn't?" Ron stammered. A tear finally broke through and tore down his cheek. George sat next to his brother again and leaned back against the wall. He never broke eye contact with his brother the entire time. He simply nodded in reply to Ron's half-question. Ron was determined not to cry. He took no notice to the lone tear on his freckled cheek. He summoned up his courage and asked the question.

"W-Who saved you?" he breathed. George looked away for a moment before looking back.

"Bill." Ron's confused look begged him to explain. George bit his lip. "Well, I knew something was wrong with you because I recognized the signs. You feel like no one notices, but they do. Bill knew something was wrong and found me one day in my room. I lied and told Fred I was sick. He was getting me ice cream or some nonsense and i was getting my blade out. Just as I pressed it to my palm, Bill came in. He didn't say a word, but came over and took my blade. He snapped it in half and healed my hand. I was mad at him. You know what it's like! I was addicted." Ron nodded in sympathy still silently begging for him to go on.

"Well... I was seriously pissed at him. I got up and demanded he fix it. Instead he just pushed me over. I fell and tried to reason with him, you know, make him understand. But he wouldn't. You just can't understand unless you've been through it." Ron nodded before he continued pointedly, "Or so I thought." He stopped nodding and blushed for a second. "He knelt down and told me I was better than that and didn't need it. Eventually I gave up and he hugged me and made me tell him I'd never do it again." he paused again to look at Ron. He scowled.

"That's it?" he asked. "B-But... that..." he said timidly pointing to the deep gash below the elbow.

"Yeah...well, it wasn't as simple as a promise. As soon as Bill left, I screamed into a pillow. Fred came up, gave me ice cream, yada yada. Later that night I went into the bathroom. I jumped in the shower and took out a pocket knife from a hiding spot. He didn't understand. No one did. All I could think about was how unfair everything was. All I felt was hatred. I just..." he cut off and took a deep breath. Ron gulped. "I jammed the knife in my arm. I just pierced it. That one cut was the best and worst cut I ever did. I dragged it through my arm. I shoved it deeper and deeper as I tore it through my arm. I felt it hit the bone and yanked it out. I just watched the blood fall out. It was the most pain I've ever created. But at the same time, it relieved the most pain ever. It started going bad though. My whole arm went numb and I was shaking. I knew I seriously screwed up this time, but it didn't matter because the pain was intoxicating." Ron wasn't sure when the tears started falling, but now he was sobbing dryly. George put an arm around his shoulder. He almost said screw it and didn't tell Ron anymore, but his eyes pleaded with him.

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Aww. George scared Ron. Now he feels bad. He doesn't wanna tell him any more but Ron wants to know.  
What to do?

Keep reading thats what:)

Soon we'll find out about bill and george's logic.

-singsong- Buuuuuuuuut, reviews sure are niiiiiiiiice...

lol.


	11. Do it again

Yay! Long chapter!

Lassan Malfoy-Thanks for the review! If you're speechless, i take it as a good sign. :) Hope you like the rest!

Ok, Remember, mescrewed with Weasleys! This adds another to my list. lol. Don't hate.

Enjoy!  
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George drew in a shaky breath and continued. "I don't ever remember turning the water on, but I remember after I pulled the knife out. The water just washed over it. I watched as my work went down the drain. I watched as all traces of it were washed away. It made me happy and mad at the same time. I remember the sounds all just muffled and I could barely focus. I just stared at my arm as the blood drained from it. The black just kinda came around until the last thing I saw was red." He looked to Ron again, afraid he was scaring him. Ron still sobbed and held pleading eyes on his own, hungry for more information. "As soon as my eyes opened, I saw Bill above me. He looked mad and disappointed. Somehow I was in clean cloths and sitting on his bed...almost like you now." Ron smiled a little.

"W-well, he stood right in front of me and looked down. He stared at me until I cried." Ron raised his eyebrows at this. He had NEVER seen any of his brothers cry, not even in pain. George shifted in place and looked away. He thought a moment and decided it best to look in Ron's eyes and hold his trust. "He told me never to do this again. I would have shrugged him off, but he told me something that got me to listen to him. Just like us...now..." He paused shortly. "He finally told me how he recognized the signs of depression because he too felt it at one point." he ran his fingers through his ginger hair.

"He gave in to the pressure! He cut too Ron! Only, he only tried it once or twice. He realized it didn't do any more than hurt him more. It made him more worried kuz he had something to hide. He talked to me and made me realize. It wasn't just my problem. I couldn't control it. I was addicted. He helped me get out of it." George stopped dramatically and silence filled the still room. Ron almost jumped up and shook him. "Well?" he pressed. George stared him dead in the eye.

"He pulled a knife out of his cloak and pushed it in my hand. He used his strict, determined voice and...he said..." George sighed before quoting Bill. "'Do it again.' he said. I just sat there shaking and full of confusion. He said, 'Do it George. One more time. You wanted to so bad, so now do it.' I didn't move because I was scared. He kept going though. 'Down your arm. Cross every cut you ever made.' he demanded. I-I couldn't do it. He took my hand in his and touched the tip of the blade to my wrist. I was so scared I was crying. I was terrified. Bill looked in my eyes then down on my wrist. He-he..." George was trembling. He could barely continue. But he did. Ron needed to hear.

"He pushed the tip down through my skin. He told me to drag it up my arm. Too terrified to go against him, I-I did it. Up until I was shaking so hard I couldn't hold the knife anymore. I realized I was shaking with tears, fear, and relief. I finally had someone to confide in. I knew I could trust him. He freed me from my addiction. That one cut meant more than any before ever had. That cut was made by my sibling. A cut made for me to prooved that I was loved. After I dropped the knife, I tore my eyes away and cried. Only... Bill tipped my head back to look at my arm. He made me watch. He made me see how close I came to death. He made me see how scary it was to see something like that happen." Ron was frozen. His brother's stuttering words were wracked with tears. He didn't sob, only tears ran rivers down his cheeks. Ron's red face had identical streams of salt water. His breath however was not shaky like George's, but shallow, fast, uneven and chest burning.

"A-And?" Ron voiced timidly. George just looked in Ron's eyes. "Then he hugged me. He hugged me and it was all better." he stated simply. Ron asked again. "T-That's it?" he was confused. George nodded. "That's it. There didn't need to be anymore. I never cut again. He taught me how to hide the scars and every time i felt alone, I talked to him. I never needed it anymore." Ron swallowed hard and looked around. He glanced up at George. George answered the unasked question though.

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Awww! Bill helped George. How sweet.  
Is George going to help Ron too?

Read to find out!

Fred's story comes in play too!  
Explanations and touchyfeelyness ahoy!


	12. Always Fred and George

Midnight808- Thanks for the review! Yeah! Bill is awesome. Here your chance to read on Fred!

Hope yall like!

Ok. Heres another chapter with yet another Weasley i screwed with. heehee.

enjoy.  
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"Do you want to cut still? Do you think it still helps?" Ron shook his head feverously. The thought made his stomach drop. "Then no Ron. I'm not gonna make you cut. In fact, I never wanna see you touch a blade to your arm again. I think you understand. You come to me any time you need to let out anger or frustration. Got it?" he ordered. Ron nodded again. He looked nervously up at George again. George was watching Ron for signs of him lying.

"George?" George raised and eyebrow. "W-well...why did you do it in the first place?" he asked in barely a whisper. George sighed. He knew Ron would ask at some point. He DID leave his and Fred's part out of the discussion previously.

"Well... At first it was just because I wanted attention." George said softly. "Sort of. I was really angry and I did it to see if anyone even noticed me." Ron guessed sadly, "They didn't." George nodded. "They didn't... So after that, I added not being noticed to my list of stuff that made me feel terrible. Then I just cut kuz it relived pain, you know? Well then I got addicted to it. I had to cause pain to release pain. After a while I started trying different things, like experimenting with different cuts, cutting in different places, using different instruments, burns, hell, I even used my nails at some points." George shifted uncomfortably as Ron watched him with watering eyes. But he persisted.

"George, why'd you think you had to cut?" George bit his lip, but looked to his brother.

"Being in the middle is just as hard as being the youngest or oldest. I know I can NEVER be as good as Bill or Charlie. I know it! ...Mum says me n' Fred just don't work hard enough. We don't try. Bloody hell, we do! We work hard on the stuff we make! Think about it, if neither of us were good at Potions or Transfiguration, could we make all the shit we do now? No!... But Mum doesn't think we work hard. She looks down on us and misses the feverous work we do EVERY NIGHT. Also, everyone knows me n' Fred like to joke around and be pranksters. So everything that goes wrong, the blame goes to us. We both get in so much trouble it's crazy. Sure, most of the time it is our fault, but sometimes we don't even do anything. But it's always, 'Fred and George! What did you do!'" George mocked their mother very well causing both the redheads to laugh. Once they calmed down, George got serious again and continued.

"That's another thing I got sick of real fast. Everything is always 'Fred and George this'. Or, 'Fred and George that'. Always Fred and George! Never just Fred and just George. Always both of us. We're always the twins! We do have our identities you know! But I guess I just figured I'm not even George, I'm just the twin who cut." he spit out scornfully. But then he softened. "You know Fred had a problem too?" Ron's stomach had been twisting into a ball of steel. But now, he just felt sick.

"He did?"George nodded regretfully.

"He had crazy eating disorders." Ron's eyes flew wide. "He didn't eat anything at meals. This was at Hogwarts though. A few years back. He would just sit in the Great Hall. I noticed because he was my brother, but he was really good at hiding it. He wouldn't eat anything-" Ron cut him off. "Fred never looked thin! But...he wasn't like fat either! Why would he do that!"

"Relax Ron. Other wise I can't tell you anything else." Ron took a deep breath and waited for answers. "Good. Well, Fred never was thin because he always worked out insanely. All his stomach was muscle. It was crazy."

"But...When did he do that? How long did it last? I never noticed! Is he ok now!" George was scared Ron would hyperventilate soon. "Ron. Breathe. Now, or I'm not saying ANYTHING." Ron tried to breathe calmly but he was trembling. George ran his fingers through his hair again.

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Woo! Explanations ahoy! I promise! lol.

The next chapter is the LAST.

So please review and make me feel important or I might leave you hanging. ;)


	13. A light in the shadows

WantingxMemories-Thanks so much for reviewing! This is the end! No more cliffies! Hope you keep reading! Check out my other stories too! I have a oneshot posted. Others in mind. Thanks again!  
Midnight808-Yep! Poor Weasleys lol. I know. But, it's time to end. Glad you like so much. Check out my other stuff too. I'm planning much more! All I gotta do is finish the stories, and POP they're on the site. :)

This is it! The final chapter! Heres where it all adds up! -I hope!- Thanks to my reviewers! Hope I don't disappoint you with the end! If there's a demand for a sequel, I might write one.

Review and let me know what you think!

Thanks guys! Over 700 reads in less then a week!

Enjoy my wonderful readers!  
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"A few years ago. He started at Hogwarts. I noticed he seemed a little more mellow than usual so I kept an eye on him. That's when I noticed. He never ate at Hogwarts. But when we came home that year, it was terrible. Mum noted that he looked extremely pale and thin. She was worried about him so she watched him like a hawk. He knew it so he ate in her presence. Once he excused himself from dinner early and I followed him. I saw him go into the bathroom and throw up. It was so sad. Almost like the food made him sick." He looked questioningly at Ron. Ron spoke up quietly.

"Yeah. I stopped eating kuz I felt like it was something I could control. After a while, it pissed me off to eat. It feels horrible. It's like... when you eat an entire feast and then someone stuffs a whole 'nother half a pie down your throat. You just feel horrible..." George didn't notice the tears coming out his eyes again, adding to the salt already caked on his cheeks.

"So how did Fred stop?"

"I came up to him one night and told him I saw him throwing up in the bathroom. I told him he looked super sick. He trusted me and spilled his secret though. I think he was scared. He told me how he did it all the time and frequently retched out blood. He was terrified. I knew I was the only one he'd ever told. I promised to help him. He openly told me he knew he needed help. He told me how he got dizzy and fainted and how he felt weak and worked out to overcome the fatigue, but how he felt like he was dying. I told him he was. He knew how pale he was and how malnourished. He let me take him to St. Mungo's and Mum never knew. No one else ever found out and we put it in the past. Now we're our normal selves, well, except he still doesn't know my secret... unless he hasn't told me."

"Like you didn't tell him you knew?" Ron asked. George nodded and took to hugging his knees like Ron had previously. Ron however, lay down and put his hands behind his head. He stared at the ceiling and thought. How was it he could miss so much about his own family? He always expected there to be secrets, but none like his. He was too caught up in his own self-pity to notice anyone else feelings.

At last, George had stopped crying and Ron had become more rational. He looked to his big brother and smiled. A true, happy smile. He didn't have to plaster a false one on his face. He was truly happy. He felt loved and cared for. George had spilled his most deepest secrets to him. They actually had a conversation like he were a mentor and not a big, prankster brother. George flashed a small smile back. Ron gave in and flung himself onto George. He clung into a tight hug which George returned happily.

"Can you teach me how to hide these?" Ron asked into George's shoulder. George pulled away. He spent the next hour until his family all returned teaching Ron how to do and undo the spell. Soon Ron's skin looked good as normal. Both brothers were joking around again. Ron felt hungry for the first time in what felt like, and probably was, months.

Finally, the light that had hidden Ron in the shadows was shining. He had a source of sunlight in his life that he could go to when he needed warmth. Rather than in the dark where his mind had been lost, he now had daylight to guide the way. Ron was no longer, shadowed.

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Hope you liked and I didn't disappoint you. Should there be a sequel? I dunno. Give ideas if you think so.

Good bye for now.  
-J X


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